ItsNotWe.com

Because you’re not actually going to help, are you?

The Problem: Fake Solidarity Through Pronouns

Welcome to the uncomfortable truth about customer service communication. You know that person who says “We need to resolve this issue” and then transfers you to another department while they go on break? Yeah, we’re talking about them.

The royal “we” has infected our support tickets, phone calls, and email chains like a particularly annoying virus. It’s time to vaccinate ourselves with a healthy dose of pronoun honesty.

Classic Examples of “We” Abuse

❌ "We should probably look into your refund request."

✅ "You should probably look into my refund request."

Translation: I'm forwarding this to billing and forgetting about it.

❌ "Can we get this replacement shipped by tomorrow?"

✅ "Can you get this replacement shipped by tomorrow?"

Translation: I have no control over shipping, but I need you to make it happen.

❌ "We need to escalate this to management."

✅ "You need to escalate this to management."

Translation: I'm done with this conversation and passing the buck.

The Confusion It Creates

Scenario 1: The Return

Customer:

"I need to return this defective product."

Support Agent:

"We'll get that sorted right away!"

Customer (thinking):

"Great! They're handling it personally."

Reality:

Agent creates ticket, assigns to returns department, marks as "resolved."

Scenario 2: The Complaint

Customer:

"I've been overcharged on my bill!"

Manager:

"We need to investigate this immediately!"

Customer (thinking):

"Finally! Someone who cares and will help!"

Reality:

Manager forwards to accounting with note: "Please handle."

Scenario 3: The Service Outage

Customer:

"My service has been down for three days!"

Support:

"We're working on it as we speak!"

Customer (thinking):

"They're actively fixing it right now!"

Reality:

Support agent submits ticket to technical team, goes to lunch.

When “We” IS Actually Appropriate

Let’s be fair. Sometimes “we” is legitimate:

When you’re actually going to participate in solving the problem
When discussing shared company responsibility or policies
When you’re actively working on the issue while speaking
When you have the authority and ability to fix it yourself

✅ “We’ve processed your refund” (When you actually hit the refund button)
✅ “We apologize for the inconvenience” (When speaking for the company)
✅ “We’re updating your account now” (When you’re literally doing it)

REMEMBER: If your only contribution is documenting complaints, it's not "we" - it's "someone else"

The Cure: Pronoun Integrity

Next time you’re about to say “we,” ask yourself:

Will I personally be handling this issue?
Do I even have access to fix this problem?
Will I follow up on this myself?
Am I just creating work for another department?

If you answered “no” to any of these, congratulations! You’ve discovered it’s not “we” - it’s “you” (or “they” or “the other department”).